Marriage they say, is a union between two people, i.e male and female albeit in recent times, the call for protection of the rights of gay couple and approval of some clergy in blessing gay marriages has become quite rife. Regardless of the brouhaha surrounding marriage, sometimes the accompanying drama depending on where one hails from is a whole mood on its own.
The big question that follows up then is that how do I find that dream partner, with a beautiful rounded butt, that gets my attention and takes my mind off death. Or perhaps, you are also looking out for the ideal as reinforced by the media as a tall handsome gentleman, who wears that perfume that takes you off your feet and completely buries you with his glistering valley like 6 packs.
All these requirements and dreams are normal says one couple, who prefer to be known as sister and brother Mumuni. The Mumuni couple is a dream couple who make marriage look so dignifiable and refreshing. They tell Br Media that to a huge extent there is a perfect partner, but finding that is like pulling off the whisks of a hungry wounded lion. According to them, what they first looked out for in each other was each other’s ability to compromise on issues.
In some part of the Northern Region where Mr. Mumuni hails from, males are treated as kings, hence they sometimes do not wash their own clothes, nor do laundry. According to Mrs. Mumuni, although Mr. Mumuni had the perfect figure physically, that part of their culture was a discouragement for her, but to her surprise, Mr. Mumuni was a figment of surprise.
Usually, I would want my husband to cook with me, wash with me, dine together with me and if possible, we take our shower together. But, looking at my brother then, I mean my husband if you want me to just go straight to the point, because we see ourselves as biological twins. Hahahah.. When I did my service in their area, I realized how different the men were treated, and it automatically took him out of the selection list into relegation, but I didn’t abandon our friendship. One day, he visited me in my bungalow, and unfortunately, I wasn’t feeling well, but I couldn’t ask him to do anything for me because I feared he may not do it. After enquiring that I had not eaten, he left me and headed straight to the kitchen to prepare tea for me. Although it was less sugary than I had preferred, I enjoyed it because he had compromised on tradition and that was all I needed to give him the confirmation that I also loved him.
So you see, if he is able to compromise that much for your sake and love, you would lose the whole world.
For a certainty, marriage is a game of compromise, if your partner cannot compromise on the least things to make you happy, then certainly, Mrs Mumuni, would advice you to walk away from the relationship. Speaking with Mr. Mumuni on what he thinks makes a partner the ideal or perfect partner, he indicated that his wife Mrs. Mumuni, was a visionary woman and a go getter, who knew no boundaries. He remembers during their days of dating, he had the opportunity to travel outside for further studies. During their time, there were very limited means of communication unlike today. According to Mr. Mumuni, he knew that he loved her sister, but he just couldn’t lay a finger on what exactly it was until he traveled. He narrated that in one of their letters, she suggested that he’d do three jobs if he had the opportunity to do so. However, he only had two. She therefore advised that he gets himself a project here. Knowing so much the mistrust between some Ghanaians abroad and their family members, she helped him in the construction of their first flat, and even helped him gather data for his research while he was still in Australia, pursuing higher degree.
I was just shocked because I had never seen anyone with such a big heart. She knew I could have cheated on her, but she always thought of the future. She helped me complete my thesis and won an award for the best research. The most important aspect of her having foresight was when after some disappointments by family members, she took the mantle and ensured that the plot of land was registered in my name, and monitored as my first flat was built for rent even without the knowledge of my own biological family. I’m sure if she were some random lady, she would have treated me like my family and even bolt with the money, after all, I didn’t really know her parents, but today, I can confidently say that her forcefulness and ability to see the future and support it with a brilliant idea, has made us very successful estate developers. She discouraged me from buying and rather led a deal for two buses to carry tourists and the other run long distance. This gave us extra money, when I returned and employment was an issue. Now, if you had this sort of woman for a wife, wouldn’t that be the perfect present?
Another quality to watch out for in a perfect partner is a partner who is honest and truthful. Ghanaian singer, Okyeame Kwame and his wife Anica are a perfect example in this regard. In an interview with Ghanaian television icon, Deloris Frimpong Manso, Delay, Okyeame Kwame’s wife, Anica revealed one of the secrets that has culminated into their over fourteen years of successful marriage. Usually, celebrity marriages come with its own issues that often leads to a divorce. However, Okyeame Kwame’s wife, Anica revealed that as partners, they are very honest with each other. According to her, developing this quality wasn’t easy at the start. She wanted to be convinced that she was making the right decision especially looking at the sacrifice she would be making if she were to marry Okyeame Kwame. According to her, for about a week, they could exchange phones, and both of them were at liberty to pick each other’s calls.
“In today’s world where cheating has become the order of the day, if I have a man who would go and come back into my arms, telling me all the temptations he had to succumb and those he failed, I felt he was the perfect guy for me. Sometimes, he could come up with this crazy idea where we kept each other’s phone and knew each other’s passwords and this convinced me. He is very honest with me. Dealing with women who like you is a huge issue, but to let you know that honestly, he made a mistake with a lady during our dating period was a rehearsal and till date after marriage, he knows how to handle troublesome situation with other women she added. I’m pretty sure, everyone wants an open book and not an opaque book with a lot of concealments as a partner.
If your partner is not ready to even share his or her password with you, Anica has made it clear, the decision is yours to make.
Although these situations are unique on their own, they give us a hint that for a marriage to work, both couple must have the ability to remain honest with each other, compromise and be able to think ahead of time. Although, these qualities may not be conclusive, and this is the view of some people who spoke out of experience. However, albeit the situation may be different with everyone, the decision is yours to make to make sure that your relationship works, since as imperfect humans, we can’t attain perfection, we may only strive to attain some level of satisfaction that makes each person in the relationship mostly happy.